Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Realization: Becoming Alex

Sometimes you just have to realize reality. Sometimes you just have to acknowledge that it's not in your hands anymore; that you've done all you can do and it's time to leave the rest open for interpretation. It's time to stop making plans for every minute of my day and love the life I'm living.

I live in a place of beauty and I have friends around me who love me. I go to an amazing university with incredible people who do astounding things everyday. All too often I pass up the beauty of this and all too often I forget to be grateful for everything I have....which in all reality, is so very much. I've had the best time this last semester and I plan to make this summer one to remember. I miss home and my good friends from Anacortes, but I have things to do here, even if I don't know exactly what they are. There's so much wonder in it all.

Today I realized that not everything has to be planned out to a dot. That there's so much joy in going through life with a unknowing adventure in front of you. I know that everyone says "live life to the fullest"...but maybe there's a reason for the constant use of the phrase? Today I realized there's a lot of value, a lot more then I ever expected.

I believe I am on this earth to learn, grow, and help others. Recently I feel as if I'm always worried about myself or always complaining about life and the trials I'm going through, and in doing so I neglect to realize just how good I have it. If I don't come to understand and appreciate just how blessed I am, I'll never be able to learn from my mistakes. I'll never grow to be the person I am meant to be. But most importantly I wont be able to help others and that's something I always want to be able to do.

I love life...slightly cliché but I do. There is so much out there for me. I haven't traveled the world. I haven't saved the world (yet)...HECK I haven't even graduated from college! There is so much waiting for me in life and it's hard to realize that but there really is. I have a lot to do... I'm a nineteen year old in college and today I realized that's all I have to be. I can just be Alex Johnson. The girl who loves Cars, music, the outdoors. Loves to read, paint, and play basketball. Loves being held and dancing as if no one's watching. The girl who misses her island and her family.The girl who wants more then anything to feel like she's had an impact on the world in some small way, even if it's just through one person. Who wants to be remembered for always staying true to who she was.  The girl who is ready to live life and let the world throw whatever at her. I, Alex Johnson, am ready to be me and never turn back.

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